Father’s Day is a time that you can reflect on the times you had as a kid with your dad. For some people this can provoke wonderful memories and for others it can give them grief for not being able to have the relationship with their dad that they think they deserve especially if their dad was abusive or abandoning. Sometimes this can keep a person resentful and bitter and become one of the reasons that they begin to pursue drugs and alcohol – so they can forget about the pain that was caused.
This year, connecting with your father around Father’s Day may be in your best interest no matter how much suffering he may have caused you. As your dad gets older, time will eventually run out and you may never get another chance to rekindle a better relationship. Instead of looking back in regret for not utilizing the time you had, now is the time to take charge to make things better.
Work the steps
In a 12-Step program, working the steps can be life-changing in your relationships including with your dad. Learning to connect to a Higher Power and then do a Fourth Step inventory can give you the tools that you need to move forward without continuing to carry the baggage that has caused you resentment for long enough.
This does not mean that you have to forget what has happened in the past, but this just means that you can relinquish the adversity that you have been faced with your dad. Once you are able to forgive him, you can let go of a tremendous burden that has probably plagued you for too long.
Learning how to forgive can set the ball rolling for you to have compassion for the things that your dad did to you. With compassion you can be better relieved of the suffering that has caused you grief in the past. In return, you will start having compassion for others which will help you in your recovery program.
Just because you are trying to connect with your father does not mean that you have to talk all the time or spend massive amounts of time together. Try to figure out what is important to you and focus on making that happen by setting the boundaries that you need to feel comfortable.
When you start trying to improve your relationship with your father, take things as slow as you need and make it all about finding a better way to communicate going forward. You will be thankful that you are giving such an important relationship a chance.
Renewal Recovery Solutions is an extensive treatment program that can show someone who is struggling with drugs and alcohol how to stay sober. Our passionate staff can help our clients to find their full potential and integrate healthy support systems that can be beneficial for their recovery.
Call us today to get started!